Pet Your Pet, Self-Care Week 17

The Toolbox is filling up! What is today’s Self-care Tool?

It’s something many of us do quite naturally, without even thinking about it. Get ready to stuff your favorite pet into your Toolbox! LOL! Think about THAT for a few moments! Hilarious!! Unless you have a pet mouse, it would probably be pretty tricky to get your pet into a toolbox. I know my cats HATE it when I have to force them into an enclosed box (cat carrier) to go to the vet or get their claws trimmed or ANYTHING! Dogs are generally more agreeable to being confined in their kennel. But would it fit into a toolbox? Not unless it’s a Teacup Yorkie or something similar.

Hey. What’s all this talk about pets? We were going to talk about Self-Care tools.

So, what IS this week’s tool?

It’s short and sweet. It’s petting your pet, of course.

We all do it every day because we like it and we know our cat or dog likes it too. But did you know that simple, natural act has greater benefits?

I’ve had cats almost my entire life. The times I haven’t had at least one, were stressful and I knew there was something missing in my life. Even our rescued, shelter cats who are still rather stand-offish and “skitterish”, will condescend to allow us to pet them. It’s on their terms but it is still helps to me be calm when I stroke their fur. Petting them just makes my world a better place.

There is all sorts of information and research about how animals help the people around

them. We feel less stressed, sleep better, eat better, get more exercise, relate better with other people, have more confidence (as in helping a shy child read out loud, for instance) when we have a pet or therapy animal. I even read an article where an animal expert, Arden Moore, said playing with your pet spider can relax you. Huh? I don’t know about spiders being relaxing. I do know spiders are anything BUT relaxing to me and many people I know! But hey. Whatever floats your boat, right?

I’ve digressed. Ms. Moore also says even bird watching is relaxing and beneficial.

Studies show that touch, such as stroking an animal’s fur, releases the hormones oxytocin and endorphins. Those are the “feel-good” hormones and can relax both you and your pet, helping reduce heart rate and blood pressure.

Having a pet helps relieve anger, depression and even the perception of pain, giving the person a reason to get out of bed in the morning, purpose and a companion.

I’ll keep it short but if you’re interested in reading more from experts and research I’ve included a few references at the bottom.

The main thing to remember is that if you have a cat or dog (or spider!?), you have a wonderful tool for reducing stress and taking good care of yourself. Don’t- or can’t- live with an animal? “Borrow” one from a friend. Or perhaps, volunteer at the local shelter and help them socialize the strays. There is even some research to suggest that simply thinking about an animal is helpful to our brains and can produce some of the good effects of being around animals.

My photos are, on the left, Ebert the Orange and Joey curled together; and my grand-dog, Nash, who thinks he’s a lap dog in spite of being a Standard Poodle! Just a few of the loves in my life.

Do you have a dog or cat? Or spider?? What is your experience? I’d truly love to hear about your pet- even if it’s a spider. Please share how you find your pet relaxing in the comments.

Thanks so much for joining us in this journey to fill up a Toolbox of Self-Care tools so we are all prepared to *take good care of yourself*!

Some resources, as promised:

https://www.today.com/health/5-ways-pets-can-ease-your-stress-6C10423970

https://www.southbostonanimalhospital.com/blog/8-ways-pets-relieve-stress

https://adaa.org/learn-from-us/from-the-experts/blog-posts/consumer/alleviating-anxiety-stress-and-depression-pet

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3408111/

Flowers, Self-Care Tools, Week 16

How was your Easter? I hope you had a good day.

Easter makes me think of new life and new beginnings. It makes me think of Springtime and flowers!  Flowers naturally bring us joy and lift our spirits. Whether you buy them for yourself or someone sends them, it’s been scientifically shown that flowers help combat depression and boost memory, among other things. That makes having flowers a wonderful Self-Care Tool to add to our Toolboxes!

We all enjoy flowers. It’s a no-brainer that they make us feel special and appreciated. However, there is research that shows many benefits of having flowers in your environment. Both Rutgers University and Harvard University (among the big names) have done research on those benefits and have found that flowers bring more satisfaction to our lives. “The presence of flowers triggers happy emotions, heightens feelings of life satisfaction and affects social behavior in a positive manner far beyond what is normally believed.” (Jeannette Haviland-Jones, Ph.D., Professor of Psychology at Rutgers and lead researcher on the study.) According to this study in 2007, flowers bring immediate pleasure to the recipient. They can also have long term mood enhancing qualities and enhance a person’s social connections.

“Flowers bring about positive emotional feelings in those who enter a room,” said Dr. Haviland-Jones. “They make the space more welcoming and create a sharing atmosphere.” See? Flowers not only make you happy, they affect those around you as well.

Another study, also conducted at Rutgers, regarded effects of flowers on seniors.

“The results are significant because as our nation grows older and life becomes more stressful, we look for easy and natural ways to enhance our lives – and the lives of our aging parents,” said Dr. Jeannette Haviland-Jones. “Now, one simple answer is right under our noses.” Dr. Haviland-Jones and her associates found that flowers decreased depression, enhanced social connections and refreshed memory in the study group. All these situations can especially be problems for older people. Flowers are so much better than a pill, prettier and cheaper too!

Here’s a fun chart. I’m copying it directly for you. I really love the way flowers and colors speak to us. (This is also from Rutgers in association with the Society of American Florists.) By the way, I have no connection to Rutgers. I just found their research intriguing and interesting!

“Flower Therapy 
The researchers from Rutgers determined that the flower recipients in the study experienced an elevation in mood that lasted for days. And Chinese healers – who’ve long believed in “flower power” – say that it doesn’t stop there. They say you can utilize flowers to summon whatever power or emotion you’d like – and that the secret is in the flower’s color. Each color creates a different frequency of light waves, they believe, which travel through the retina and down the optic nerve, setting off a chain reaction of responses in the body. Neurotransmitters are then released, inducing the production of calming hormones like melatonin, stimulating hormones like adrenaline, and mood-boosting hormones like serotonin.

Here’s how you can enjoy the physical and emotional benefits of flowers

Increase energy with red roses
Since red has the slowest vibratory rate and and longest wavelength, it stimulates adrenal glands, boosting energy.

Boost confidence with irises 
The color indigo stimulates the brain’s pineal gland, which is the regulator of sleep patterns. Indigo also helps to free the mind of worries, fear and inhibition.

Enhance alertness with sunflowers
Yellow light waves stimulate the brain, making you alert, clearheaded and decisive. And since we associate yellow with the sun’s rays and daylight, it’s said to help us feel more optimistic.

Get a good night’s sleep with bluebells
Blue triggers the production of melatonin, a brain chemical that helps us relax and sleep soundly. Blue also stimulates the thyroid gland to release thyroxine, a hormone that regulates metabolic rate.

Relax with green zinnias
Green affects the nervous system, making us breathe slowly and deeply, slowing the production of stress hormones and helping the heart relax.

Prevent allergies with orange daisies 
Orange strengthens the immune system and the lungs, which can ward off spring allergies. Orange also has a strong beneficial effect on the digestive system and can stimulate the sexual organs.

Relieve stress with lilacs
Violet cools us, alleviating “hot” conditions like heat rash and sunburn, and suppressing hunger and balancing metabolism. It also stimulates the pituitary gland, the part of the brain that releases tension-fighting beta-endorphins.” (2002, Society of American Florists)

Not to leave Harvard out, Nancy Etcoff, Ph.D., of Massachusetts General Hospital and Harvard Medical School in conjunction with the Society of American Florists, explored the effects of flowers in the home environment. In 2006, Dr. Etcoff conducted a study showing that people feel more compassionate toward others, have less worry and anxiety, and feel less depressed when flowers are present in the home. The study also revealed that people who have flowers in their home find the positive effects of their presence carries over into their work environment and can continue for up to a week.

So, go buy some flowers for yourself! They will share their happy beauty with you. Even the cheapest bunch at the grocery store will last for a week or more when the “Flower Food”, usually included, is used in the water. If there’s no “Flower Power”, crush an aspirin in warm water and be sure to cut a bit off the stems right before putting the flowers into the water.

Have a family member who’s allergic to flowers? Bummer! But you can try putting the bouquet in a room not frequented by that individual. You can go to that spot and enjoy them, along with some silence and rest and get the benefit of using several Self-Care Tools at the same time.

Flowers are so lovely; pick some from your yard, get some from the grocery store or go all out and get some from a florist. However you attain them, flowers will pay you back in so many happy ways! It might feel like a big splurge, but look at the benefits!

Flowers bring happiness and happy people are kinder and live longer!

Do you enjoy flowers regularly? Where do you get yours?

I’d love to hear your thoughts regarding this Tool- Buy Yourself Flowers. Please feel free to share with all of us!

Thanks so much for reading and sharing! Have a flowery week!

 

 

 

 

Check Your Foundation: Self-care Toolbox, week 15

What tool are we adding to our Toolbox today? A Check-meter.

What is a check-meter? Read on!

At the beginning of the year, many of us spend time setting goals and intentions. We want to set a foundation and a focus- a pathway- for the “clean slate” that stretches 12 months into the future.

It’s time to check that pathway, now, a third of the way through the year.

We sometimes get blindsided by major life events that force us to detour off our preferred course, the projected path. Those are the times we put everything else aside and wholly focus on the situation that crashed into us. And of course, that’s exactly what we need to do. Major life crises require our full attention. And I will give myself fully to it.

Smaller situations can also arise. Things that can push us off our path. Maybe a vicious head cold sidelines us for a week or two… Or the water heater breaks and floods and requires another week that isn’t in the plan… Or a friend has a need… Or a pet gets sick. Any number of “little” things can gobble up our perfect plan.

When things calm down, when the problem is fixed and the pet is well. When the friend is safe and the water heater (and carpet) is replaced… It’s a good time to re-assess my path. Am I still on the original path? Is it still viable? Do I still want to go that direction? Is it necessary to shift my perspective? We can’t foresee what life will throw us. We don’t know when the Lord will desire to show us something new. We have to be willing to reconsider the journey throughout the year and change course if necessary.

There are tools, important ones, that aren’t used everyday but are necessary to have available. For example, my hubs has a volt meter. He doesn’t need it to build a box or fix a chair. But when he’s working with electricity- installing a dimmer switch or fixing a lamp- he wants to know if there’s power on the line. We do not want to create one of those major detours we were just talking about! Usually, the volt meter just sits in the corner of the tool box but when we need it, it’s very important to have.

What tool are we adding today? Let’s call it a Check-meter. (As far as I know, up until just now, there was no such thing. I made it up.) We’re going to use it to check our foundation, (like a level) is it still solid? We’re going to use it to check our direction, (like a compass) are we still heading in the right direction? Ask: do I need a re-set on my original plan? Do I need a re-direct? Do I need a whole new plan? Am I firmly fixed on my core values and the things God has placed before me right now?

I get frustrated with myself and life when I’ve allowed myself to get off kilter. Of course, things come along that whack us in the head or even tackle us and throw us in a ditch. That’s pretty normal. What’s important is how we handle life after we get up and dust off.

Unless I check the map along the way, by the end of the year I can find myself on another planet- far from my intended destination. I don’t know about you, but I find it frustrating when I realize that life took a wrong turn and I blindly followed it. I feel I wasted precious time going the opposite direction of my true intentions. So every few months- quarterly, three-times-a year, twice a year- take a few minutes to sit with the Lord and check your foundation. Get out the Check-meter. Ask if adjustments need to be made. Am I still heading in the right direction? Was that life-event a wake-up call or a “distraction”?

Last month I had an issue with my back that turned into another issue and I felt I’d been side-tracked for at least three weeks. I was frustrated with the situation and with myself that I didn’t bounce back quickly as I tried to charge onward.

This morning I got at text from a friend, an opportunity to possibly sell a painting. Guess what? My website is useless. I couldn’t even send her to Fine Art America because everything there is out of date too. I really can’t take advantage of that opportunity. But re-introducing my website, etc., was one of those things God has been nudging me to do. In my desire to make up for lost time, I missed an opportunity by not re-focusing on the plan for this year. Ouch. Another question to ask: have I gotten distracted by the urgent, rather than staying focused on the important.

By checking with our original intentions, we can save ourselves a lot of frustration and maybe even missed opportunities. Instead of suddenly realizing we’re flying untethered, we can remain firmly anchored and confident that we’re in step with God’s purposes for us. And that, my friend, is a good place to be.

How about you? Do you check in with your intentions throughout the  year? I would truly like to know.

Thanks so much for reading and adding another Self-care tool to your Toolbox. Please join the conversation and share your thoughts on this little used, but important tool.

God bless you good!

Journaling: Self-care, week 14

Journaling is good for the soul. It is just between you, God and the paper you write on. It gets junk out of your mind that really can’t, or shouldn’t, be said out loud. You can rant and be angry or even rage, without killing someone with your words. You can make it a diary, sharing your secret crushes, deepest dreams and worst nightmares. You can write love letters or poetry and never worry that some self-appointed poetry critic will make fun of you.

Your journal can be your therapist. Most of us really know- deep down- what we need to do in “those” situations. If a friend told us what we’re telling the paper, we’d pray, we’d hug her and comfort her and then give her some really sound advice. I can’t tell you how many times I raged and fussed and complained on one page. Then, on the next page was able to see how I was thinking wrong, or feeling hurt, or being unforgiving. And once I saw the true problem, was able to work my way to a place of peace and acceptance or perhaps calm down enough to  see a plan.

At times, I simply want to remember beautiful works spoken by someone- or even by me! Maybe I want to remember a funny meme or a heartfelt quote. I’ve journaled ideas and dreams and notes from webinars.

I suppose there is someone out there who has come up with “Rules for Journaling”, but, if you see ’em, don’t pay attention! The beauty of journaling is that there are NO rules. You make up your rules and you are free to change them at will.

I’ve journaled Bible verses that speak to a situation I’m concerned about, then all of sudden, insight and inspiration will come and I find myself writing and writing. When I look back at it, I ask myself where all that wisdom, beauty, or understanding came from. I often preach to myself on the page.

Nothing ever has to be shared with another soul- if I don’t want to. Or I can turn what I write into a blog, article or even a book- if I want to.

Journaling helps you become aware of what you’re thinking. Writing gets those swirling thoughts out of the confines of your head and onto the cold white page, where you can SEE them. You can organize them. You can question them and see if they’re telling you the truth.

I had a long start-up to journaling. I’d write a few pages, maybe for as long as 6 months at the time. Then I’d get busy or discouraged and give it up. Or at times, re-living a particular event would be so real and raw, I’d get angry again and I’ve been know to jab my pen into the page… Well, pages, really, because the pen will pierce though several pages when the force of rage is applied. And so I’d give up again. Because, well, nice ladies who journal surely never have such a violent response to bad events. Right?

But over the years, in spite of about 10 journals begun and abandoned, I’ve become a journal-er. And I miss it when I don’t do it. My journal is a good friend. (No, I don’t name it.) I’ve had small ones and big ones. College Comps and gorgeous embossed ones. I’ve discovered my preference- spiral bound, notebook size. Add a closure and I’m in journal heaven. I still write on any handy scrap or Post-It note when I’m inspired and the journal isn’t nearby. I re-write all those scraps into the journal. I also tape whole pages in rather than re-write it. Is that being lazy or smart?

Getting Started:

* I’m a big fan of small. Start small. Don’t buy the biggest journal at Ross (even though the price is so very good!). Buy a small blank book. Even the old faithful College Composition book now comes in pretty colors and is a great choice for your beginnings. You don’t want to feel intimidated by the book. If it’s so extravagantly gorgeous, you might feel you’re responsible for writing your own War and Peace. Get some with something with some humility, something that doesn’t try to boss you around. The College Comp book friendly and already well-known to most of us. Your humble beginnings will thank you for a humble page to start your journey. And a journey it is- whether it’s a beautiful quote or grocery lists. Whether it’s rages or poetry- it’s your journey. As you move more regularly and confidently in the journey, you might want to move into something a little nicer. But perhaps, you’ll find you enjoy the undemanding College Comp book. Or just maybe, you’ll find the beautiful ones less intimidating because your own confident beauty has grown.

* Start small. Set a timer for 5 minutes and write whatever pops into your head. Write a list. Tell the paper how you feel about the weather. Ask yourself a question: What do I need? What’s my next step? Write a quote. Write a sentence.

* Don’t worry about grammar or even spelling. If you can read it, it’s fine!

*If you’re just beginning, don’t plan to write everyday- even twice a week is a good place to start.

*Keep it tucked out of sight. Protect your privacy!

*Don’t forget to date your page. Believe me, at some point, you’ll want to know when your wrote that!

*And don’t worry about your handwriting. It doesn’t have to be beautiful. Just your own regular hen-scratch is fine. Beside, as you continue to write, you might find your handwriting is improving. An added benefit.

And there ARE benefits to journaling. I have a whole list of them. Let me know if you’re interested in what scientists have found out about journaling. I don’t want to devote another 1000 words to all that right now. A blog is “supposed” to be about 800 words. (Who made that rule, anyway?). I’m already well over that limit!

Are you thinking of adding Journaling to your Self-Care Toolbox? It takes some effort, but it’s well worth it! I hope you’ll give yourself the gift of journaling.

So, please tell us, do you journal? How does it help you?

Thanks for reading. Feel free to share!

God bless you!

Move it! Self-care Week 13

Photo by Fancycrave.com on Pexels.com

Hey Ya’all!

Lots of new beginnings today… a new week AND a new month. So, Happy Monday! and Happy April!

Let’s switch gears just a little. It feels like I’ve been in my head for too long and need to physically move around a little!

Now if you  know me, you know I’m not really big on “exercise”. I mean, sure, I like to walk and stretch (some), maybe stroll (the mall). I like to be outside, take a stroll around the neighborhood or on the Greenway. But you will not find me happily doing reps at the gym. I am trying to change my thinking on that but there I am, back in my head again!

We all know it’s important to move for many reasons. The older we get, the more important it becomes. So, what’s a girl to do? Especially when that girl has never been much into lots of physical activity.

We’ve talked about moving… leaving a room for a brief change of scenery; doing the “cross over technique” to re-set out brains. Moving physically from one spot to another is always a good idea when we are stuck. It even helps when our minds are in a jumble- there’s that mind thing again. But how can we put a little extra “exercise” into our day?

Well, I’m glad you asked. If you don’t run/walk up and down the stairs in your house what feels like a hundred times a day, you probably could use a few ideas. Of course, if you’re naturally inclined to lots of activity, you’re well ahead of the game already.

Here are just a few ideas for putting a little more activity into your day.

When brushing your teeth, balance on one foot, then switch to the other. Balance is an important part of your well-being physically and as we age we tend to lose some of our innate ability to balance effortlessly. Try it! Make it fun. Move your free arm around while doing it… Picture this: you, brushing your teeth, standing on one leg like a flamingo, waving your opposite arm around like you’re flying. LOL! Fun, right? I like to make a game of it. How long can I stand on just one leg?

Yes, I realize balancing isn’t “exercise”, but it is important. So just do it!

This is simple. Instead of trying to find the closest parking place to the grocery store, take the one in the hinterlands. It’s really only a little further out and it’ll give you some extra steps. While you’re in the store, walk up and down every aisle- even if you don’t need anything from that aisle. Look how easy it was to add extra steps into your day!

Another easy one is to take the stairs instead of the elevator. While it’s not always practical… maybe your appointment is on the 10th floor… you can walk up one story and finish the journey in the elevator. Same with coming down. Walk down a few flights. Not every building makes it easy to find or use the steps, but most are pretty friendly. Check it out. Of course, if your knees are wonky, or you’re dizzy, taking the steps isn’t such a good idea. Be reasonable. Be smart. But look for ways to add just a little extra movement to your day.

Sometimes while I’m waiting for the microwave to finish up, I’ll stretch. Just easy, ordinary stretches.  Simply stretching your calf muscle, where you push against the wall or countertop, with one leg stretched out, heel on floor and streeeetch. Or raising your hands to the ceiling, and stretching your sides is a good one to use while waiting for the broccoli to finish cooking. In fact, a stretch that our parents knew as a “stretch” is always good. You know what I mean… the kind that goes with a yawn, usually executed first thing in the morning or when it’s time to go to bed. A big, old fashioned stretch. Pull all your muscles tight, raise your arms above your head. There are specific stretches to do and you can use an app to help you if you want to really get into it.

Stretches are relaxing for the most part. It’s just that we need to think of how to incorporate them into our day. I’m trying to remember to use those odd moments during the day to twist, or balance, or stretch. Trying to remember to take that far-out parking place or use the steps more often.

At the risk of being too “athletic”, here’s one more thing. Have you tried a plank? It’s not easy but it’s not terribly hard either. You’ll have to google the “how-to”, but start with where you are and do it for just 10 seconds. Then add another few seconds until you can build up your strength to do it for minutes at a time. Don’t use an app that has you doing them for a minute to begin with. Why? It’s discouraging. Get to a minute on your own, then use the app if you must. Planking builds core strength and, even I, the exercise-phobic, can tell a difference in my general well-being when I do them somewhat regularly. Try it. Make it fun. Celebrate even 5 seconds!!

Rather than call it “exercise”, I’m calling it “movement”.

Movement is another important tool to add to our Self-Care Toolbox. I hope you’ll try just a few little things I’ve mentioned. I’m sure YOU have some little tricks for adding movement into your day as well. Please share them! I, for one, am on the lookout for adding movement to my days, without tooooo much pain.

Thanks for joining in the journey! And thanks for sharing your experiences!

God bless you as you add a little extra “movement” to your day.